#5: Kelsey Bishop, Type 3 – Chasing "The Dream" vs "My Dream," Authenticity at Work, and Learning How to Rest [SP/SO 3w2 378]

Kelsey Bishop is a Type 3 (SP/SO 3w2 378) whose shift from chasing "The Dream" to discovering her dream tangibly illustrates the 3's growth journey. She is the Founder of Candor, a new kind of professional network dedicated to increasing fulfillment at work by helping you discover and share "how you work." I find Kelsey inspiring and refreshingly self-revealing. We get into some good core 3 stuff like work/activity as self-regulation and what it means to rest and restore oneself. This convo is a really good, "straight down the middle" intro to the Type 3.

Check out Candor here: joincandor.com
Kelsey’s Twitter: @kelseyCBishop

Watch the interview on YouTube: https://youtu.be/WnSf-df74iA
Join my email list and get my Free Self-Development Tools Guide: https://www.joshlavine.com/

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro
3:47 What’s it like to be introduced?
5:00 Learning the Enneagram at work, discovering I was a 3
7:50 Work as self-regulation; “My desired mode is to be working”; checking things off, feeling accomplished; the “safe haven” of work (from emotions)
10:50 Contrasting work I love and work I don’t love; “It’s so easy to see what people want me to do”
12:35 On chasing “The Dream,” joining a rocketship, not liking it
20:15 Quit the company she didn’t like and took time for reflection: “That wasn’t me. So... what is me?” - how do you know?
22:45 Oil painting practice: “I feel good when I paint”; struggling with not feeling productive, but doing it anyway. “What makes me feel grounded?”
25:05 Founding Candor “feels like the most me thing I’ve ever done.’ “It’s definitely not The Dream. It’s definitely my dream.
27:15 What’s Candor? Why it’s “my dream.” Candor’s 3-ish flavor. Celebrating people. Bringing our full selves to work. Fulfilling potential.
31:10 3 integrating to 6. “For so long I thought work was checking things off a list and feeling accomplished. But when it’s tied to a deeper mission, it feels like magic.”
34:20 On feeling emotions. “In college I was human doer.” The fear that if I feel my emotions, “I’ll never stop crying.” The tradeoff — feel my emotions now or deal with the backlog later.
41:45 Body-mind / heart separation in the 3 44:45 Relationship with rest. Feeling “indulgent,” self-critical. Trying more unplanned “restorative” days, not overplanned “vacation.”
47:45 What it means to be restored. “Giving my brain a rest”; the discipline to meditate and the excuses that come up
50:30 3 as founder, raising money, being rejected by investors is like they’re rejecting “me”; getting comfortable with “failing”
58:50 3 as leader/CEO. Leading a team. Openness and authenticity as part of the culture.
1:03:45 Vulnerable retro after letting someone go; “Here’s where I messed up.” Setting a precedent for honest self-reflection. High side of 3
1:09:00 Conclusion

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Music by Coma-Media from Pixabay
Coma-Media: https://pixabay.com/users/coma-media-24399569/
Pixabay: https://pixabay.com/